Most sex addicts are unwilling to admit that they are a sex addict and refuse to begin sexual addiction recovery. Just like anyone, they too like to think that they are different from other sex addicts. It is not surprising that most men that struggle with sexual addiction have histories of countless vain attempts to prove that they can stop and/or control their sexual behaviors on their own. They may convince themselves that their behavior is “normal” and that every man does the same as he. The persistence of this illusion is amazing. Many pursue this belief into the pit of insanity or death.
To begin recovering from sexual addiction, the sex addict has to fully concede to his innermost self that he is truly a sex addict. This is the first step in recovery. The delusion that he is like other men must be squashed.
Sex addicts, whether men or women, have lost the ability to control their thinking and behaviors for sex. Many sex addicts report that they have had periods in their life that they experienced regaining control, but such periods are usually followed by a loss of control. Often termed, “binge and purge” cycles. The addict constantly experiences a feeling of hopelessness and demoralization. Overtime, the addiction progressively gets worse, similar to any disease. The sex addict may try every imaginable remedy to recover on his own, but it is followed by a still worse relapse.
Many who are real sex addicts are not going to believe they are unable to stop on their own nor do they believe they have a problem. They will try to prove themselves exceptions to the rule and attempt to control their sexual behaviors. They will try to “lust like a gentleman.”
Here are some methods they have tried: viewing non-porn websites, putting blockers or filters on their computers, three-second rule, rubber band on wrist, throwing away prostitutes phone numbers, breaking their laptop computer with a hammer, masturbating only about his wife, masturbating only to a blank wall, swearing to never visit the massage parlor again, promising to resign from his job if he continues to view porn on his work computer, increasing his physical exercise, reading inspirational books–I could increase the list ad infinitum.
The only thing that seems to work is to accept that you have a problem and that you cannot fix it on your own. At Front Range Counseling Center, we have sexual sexual addiction counselors that have obtained training and expertise in helping men and women recover from sexual addiction. We don’t simply say that we provide sexual addiction therapy, but rather we have gained the knowledge and training that has been proven to work. Please call our center today to setup an individual counseling session and learn more about our sexual addiction recovery program.